| Help for Parents with Aspergers Children |
"Mindblindness, or the inability to make inferences about what another person is
thinking, is a core disability for those with Asperger's syndrome. Because of this,
they have difficulty empathizing with others, and will often say what they think
without considering another's feelings. The child will often assume that everyone is
thinking the same thing he is. For him, the world exists not in shades of gray, but only
in black and white. This rigidity in thought (lack of cognitive flexibility) interferes
with problem solving, mental planning, impulse control, flexibility in thoughts and
actions, and the ability to stay focused on a task until completion. The rigidity also
makes it difficult for an Asperger child to engage in imaginative play. His interest in
play materials, themes, and choices will be narrow, and he will attempt to control the
play situation."
thinking, is a core disability for those with Asperger's syndrome. Because of this,
they have difficulty empathizing with others, and will often say what they think
without considering another's feelings. The child will often assume that everyone is
thinking the same thing he is. For him, the world exists not in shades of gray, but only
in black and white. This rigidity in thought (lack of cognitive flexibility) interferes
with problem solving, mental planning, impulse control, flexibility in thoughts and
actions, and the ability to stay focused on a task until completion. The rigidity also
makes it difficult for an Asperger child to engage in imaginative play. His interest in
play materials, themes, and choices will be narrow, and he will attempt to control the
play situation."
Excerpts from The Aspergers Comprehensive Handbook
"How Aspergers syndrome gets explained to siblings depends upon the age of the
sibling and on the particular problems the Aspergers child is having. For some
children, they just need to know that their brother or sister has a brain condition
that leads them to resist change or to become fixated on certain things. Other
children have the maturity to understand the nuances of how difficult it is for the
Aspergers child to understand the emotions of others and to communicate nonverbally
with others.
Some siblings of Aspergers syndrome can act out angrily as the child who isn’t
getting the family’s attention. Others find themselves being their “brother’s keeper”,
fending off comments and teasing from other kids who see their brother or sister as
a freak. A sort of unnecessary maturity is forced on the sibling to be the protector
or go-between when it comes to other children and their sibling."
sibling and on the particular problems the Aspergers child is having. For some
children, they just need to know that their brother or sister has a brain condition
that leads them to resist change or to become fixated on certain things. Other
children have the maturity to understand the nuances of how difficult it is for the
Aspergers child to understand the emotions of others and to communicate nonverbally
with others.
Some siblings of Aspergers syndrome can act out angrily as the child who isn’t
getting the family’s attention. Others find themselves being their “brother’s keeper”,
fending off comments and teasing from other kids who see their brother or sister as
a freak. A sort of unnecessary maturity is forced on the sibling to be the protector
or go-between when it comes to other children and their sibling."
"Children with Aspergers syndrome often exhibit behaviors that are peculiar enough
to hold the attention of children who do not have the best interests of the child in
mind. Besides simple teasing, bullying of the Aspergers child can happen in situations
in which the Aspergers child has little ability to protect him or herself.
Fortunately, if such bullying happens in school, it can be managed more easily, provided
your child divulges that it is going on. Most schools are cracking down on bullying and
are treating such behavior as assault and punishable by legal means. Parents have
every right to speak with the principal, teacher or counselor in order to ask their
help in controlling the bullies. Some schools have behavioral support staff whose job
it is to get to the bottom of behavior issues and crack down on bullies."
to hold the attention of children who do not have the best interests of the child in
mind. Besides simple teasing, bullying of the Aspergers child can happen in situations
in which the Aspergers child has little ability to protect him or herself.
Fortunately, if such bullying happens in school, it can be managed more easily, provided
your child divulges that it is going on. Most schools are cracking down on bullying and
are treating such behavior as assault and punishable by legal means. Parents have
every right to speak with the principal, teacher or counselor in order to ask their
help in controlling the bullies. Some schools have behavioral support staff whose job
it is to get to the bottom of behavior issues and crack down on bullies."
"A gluten-free and casein-free diet is recommended for children with Aspergers.
Though Aspergers cannot be cured by a change in diet, many children do find relief for
their symptoms by elimination gluten and casein from their meals and snacks. A gluten-
free and casein-free diet involves the elimination of gluten and casein [common
gastrointestinal allergens] from the diet. Try cutting all wheat and milk products for
a month to determine whether or not your child has a healthier look in his/her eyes, is
experiencing fewer rashes and less painful bloating and gas, and is responding better
to his/her environment.
Although most parents feel that a total diet change would be more complex, expensive
and stressful than filling a prescription, eliminating wheat (gluten) and milk (casein)
from the diet need not be an unpleasant or cumbersome experience.
A word to the wise here: Your child’s doctor could very easily miss certain symptoms
by not looking in the right places. As a result, food allergies and intolerance could go
undiagnosed. It is not uncommon for a doctor to prescribe medicine that is
manufactured with gluten or casein in it, thereby exacerbating the situation with
another source of the allergens. Worse yet, the doctor may prescribe either hyper-
activity or psychotropic drugs, which could further disable the Aspergers child."
Though Aspergers cannot be cured by a change in diet, many children do find relief for
their symptoms by elimination gluten and casein from their meals and snacks. A gluten-
free and casein-free diet involves the elimination of gluten and casein [common
gastrointestinal allergens] from the diet. Try cutting all wheat and milk products for
a month to determine whether or not your child has a healthier look in his/her eyes, is
experiencing fewer rashes and less painful bloating and gas, and is responding better
to his/her environment.
Although most parents feel that a total diet change would be more complex, expensive
and stressful than filling a prescription, eliminating wheat (gluten) and milk (casein)
from the diet need not be an unpleasant or cumbersome experience.
A word to the wise here: Your child’s doctor could very easily miss certain symptoms
by not looking in the right places. As a result, food allergies and intolerance could go
undiagnosed. It is not uncommon for a doctor to prescribe medicine that is
manufactured with gluten or casein in it, thereby exacerbating the situation with
another source of the allergens. Worse yet, the doctor may prescribe either hyper-
activity or psychotropic drugs, which could further disable the Aspergers child."
"A child with Asperger’s Syndrome will enjoy video technology due to the repetitive
nature and predictability of video recording. Repeated viewing of a video results in
learning a variety of skills and knowledge. Video technology can teach writing skills
(letters, words, sentences) as well as language comprehension skills (syntax, object
names, shapes, sizes). Also, task-oriented behaviour, such as closing a door or making a
bed, can be taught with a step-by-step video demonstration.
It is important to note that the technology found in computers and video recording
need to be tailored to a child with Asperger’s Syndrome. Some of the basic concepts
of the computer, such as typing and disc storage, might need to be slowly and
patiently explained and demonstrated. In addition, a video camera needs to be focused
and adjusted before use. A child with Asperger’s will want to push buttons or turn
lenses at random. Video recording needs to be taught very slowly so that the child
acquires knowledge and mastery over the tasks and doesn’t experience frustration.
An Asperger’s child is an individual and any learning experience must be individualized
to meet the child’s needs. Using computer and video technology will contribute to
independent functioning and decrease the child’s reliance on other people to complete
a learning task. Above all, when teaching any child a step-by-step process, the adult
must be patient with the child’s learning process and also be willing to explain the
mistakes that a child might make while mastering a learning task."
nature and predictability of video recording. Repeated viewing of a video results in
learning a variety of skills and knowledge. Video technology can teach writing skills
(letters, words, sentences) as well as language comprehension skills (syntax, object
names, shapes, sizes). Also, task-oriented behaviour, such as closing a door or making a
bed, can be taught with a step-by-step video demonstration.
It is important to note that the technology found in computers and video recording
need to be tailored to a child with Asperger’s Syndrome. Some of the basic concepts
of the computer, such as typing and disc storage, might need to be slowly and
patiently explained and demonstrated. In addition, a video camera needs to be focused
and adjusted before use. A child with Asperger’s will want to push buttons or turn
lenses at random. Video recording needs to be taught very slowly so that the child
acquires knowledge and mastery over the tasks and doesn’t experience frustration.
An Asperger’s child is an individual and any learning experience must be individualized
to meet the child’s needs. Using computer and video technology will contribute to
independent functioning and decrease the child’s reliance on other people to complete
a learning task. Above all, when teaching any child a step-by-step process, the adult
must be patient with the child’s learning process and also be willing to explain the
mistakes that a child might make while mastering a learning task."
"The long term outcomes for those with Aspergers syndrome depends on the severity
of their symptoms, their baseline IQ, their ability to communicate and what kinds of
interventions and support they receive. Those who come from supportive families
retain a reasonable sense of self-esteem and become relatively well-educated, stand a
good chance of getting into solid relationships, finding good jobs and having a normal
life.
In other cases, the Aspergers symptoms are severe enough to affect speech and
interpersonal relationship, or the individual’s IQ is low enough to impair their ability
to find a good job, leaving them with a low paying job or on disability.
Because some Aspergers individuals suffer from depression and OCD as adults, these
secondary characteristics can negatively impact how he/she develops and grows into
adulthood."
of their symptoms, their baseline IQ, their ability to communicate and what kinds of
interventions and support they receive. Those who come from supportive families
retain a reasonable sense of self-esteem and become relatively well-educated, stand a
good chance of getting into solid relationships, finding good jobs and having a normal
life.
In other cases, the Aspergers symptoms are severe enough to affect speech and
interpersonal relationship, or the individual’s IQ is low enough to impair their ability
to find a good job, leaving them with a low paying job or on disability.
Because some Aspergers individuals suffer from depression and OCD as adults, these
secondary characteristics can negatively impact how he/she develops and grows into
adulthood."
"The historical tendency has been for students with learning difficulties like autism
and Aspergers syndrome to be segregated from the general classroom and taught in
settings like special education or even home schooling. Because Aspergers syndrome
children have average to above average intelligence, many educators believe that, with
certain adjustments, these children can be included as part of the regular educational
process, especially when they reach middle school and beyond.
Such inclusive practices take the commitment of the school system, the teachers, the
student and the family to make such a situation work effectively. Teachers need to be
taught the value of structured learning with a minimum of abrupt changes and they
may need to understand the best ways the Aspergers child learns. For example, if the
child is a visual learner, he or she needs as much opportunity to learn that way as is
possible."
and Aspergers syndrome to be segregated from the general classroom and taught in
settings like special education or even home schooling. Because Aspergers syndrome
children have average to above average intelligence, many educators believe that, with
certain adjustments, these children can be included as part of the regular educational
process, especially when they reach middle school and beyond.
Such inclusive practices take the commitment of the school system, the teachers, the
student and the family to make such a situation work effectively. Teachers need to be
taught the value of structured learning with a minimum of abrupt changes and they
may need to understand the best ways the Aspergers child learns. For example, if the
child is a visual learner, he or she needs as much opportunity to learn that way as is
possible."
"Anger and depression are both issues more common in Aspergers syndrome than in the
general population. Part of the problem stems from a conflict between longings for
social contact and an inability to be social in ways that attract friendships and
relationships. Even young children seem to know that they are not the same as other
kids and this gets emphasized in the social era of adolescence. Many cases of
depression, in fact, begin in adolescence. Anger, too, stems from feeling out of place
and being angry at one’s circumstances in life.
Ideally, the focus should be on prevention and on helping younger children with
Aspergers syndrome develop communication skills and develop a healthy self esteem.
These things can create the ability to develop relationships and friendships, lessening
the chances of having issues with anger or depression.
Anger can also come in Aspergers syndrome sufferers when rituals can’t get
accomplished or when their need for order or symmetry can’t be met. Frustration over
what doesn’t usually bother others can lead to anger and sometimes, violent out-
bursts. This kind of anger is best handled through cognitive-behavioral therapy that
focuses on maintaining control in spite of the frustration of not having their needs
met."
general population. Part of the problem stems from a conflict between longings for
social contact and an inability to be social in ways that attract friendships and
relationships. Even young children seem to know that they are not the same as other
kids and this gets emphasized in the social era of adolescence. Many cases of
depression, in fact, begin in adolescence. Anger, too, stems from feeling out of place
and being angry at one’s circumstances in life.
Ideally, the focus should be on prevention and on helping younger children with
Aspergers syndrome develop communication skills and develop a healthy self esteem.
These things can create the ability to develop relationships and friendships, lessening
the chances of having issues with anger or depression.
Anger can also come in Aspergers syndrome sufferers when rituals can’t get
accomplished or when their need for order or symmetry can’t be met. Frustration over
what doesn’t usually bother others can lead to anger and sometimes, violent out-
bursts. This kind of anger is best handled through cognitive-behavioral therapy that
focuses on maintaining control in spite of the frustration of not having their needs
met."
"Because there is no identifiable biochemical problem in Aspergers syndrome and
because many researchers believe the syndrome is a result of fundamental changes in
the brain structure, medications will probably never cure Aspergers syndrome. On the
other hand, there are several medications that have been found to control some of the
symptoms of Aspergers syndrome or the comorbidities found with the condition.
A medication called atomoxetine has been found to improve some of the aspects of
Aspergers syndrome that mimic those of attention deficit disorder. Several studies
have used the drug to reduce symptoms of irritability, social withdrawal and
repetitive speech seen in this disorder.
Medications normally directed toward treating obsessive compulsive disorder have
been tried in children with Aspergers syndrome who have shown obsessive and
compulsive tendencies. While the medication doesn’t treat some of the core symptoms
of Aspergers syndrome, it has been shown to improve OCD symptoms.
Antidepressants can be attempted in Aspergers children/teens who suffer from
secondary depression. The depression isn’t generally a part of the Aspergers
syndrome itself but is found as a result of some of the distressing life
circumstances often found in Aspergers syndrome."
because many researchers believe the syndrome is a result of fundamental changes in
the brain structure, medications will probably never cure Aspergers syndrome. On the
other hand, there are several medications that have been found to control some of the
symptoms of Aspergers syndrome or the comorbidities found with the condition.
A medication called atomoxetine has been found to improve some of the aspects of
Aspergers syndrome that mimic those of attention deficit disorder. Several studies
have used the drug to reduce symptoms of irritability, social withdrawal and
repetitive speech seen in this disorder.
Medications normally directed toward treating obsessive compulsive disorder have
been tried in children with Aspergers syndrome who have shown obsessive and
compulsive tendencies. While the medication doesn’t treat some of the core symptoms
of Aspergers syndrome, it has been shown to improve OCD symptoms.
Antidepressants can be attempted in Aspergers children/teens who suffer from
secondary depression. The depression isn’t generally a part of the Aspergers
syndrome itself but is found as a result of some of the distressing life
circumstances often found in Aspergers syndrome."
"Being a member of a family in which one or more members have Aspergers syndrome
can be extremely stressful at times. Sometimes it seems as if the entire family focus
is on the Aspergers child and on the various tantrums and behaviors that come with
it. Family members, and especially parents, can feel a low level of anxiety in
anticipation of what could happen next.
It’s vital to take steps as a parent or family member to take time for yourself away
from the situation when things feel overwhelming. Take turns with the other parent
so you each have peaceful times away from the situation. If possible, spend one on one
time with other children in the home. This will reduce their stress level as well."
can be extremely stressful at times. Sometimes it seems as if the entire family focus
is on the Aspergers child and on the various tantrums and behaviors that come with
it. Family members, and especially parents, can feel a low level of anxiety in
anticipation of what could happen next.
It’s vital to take steps as a parent or family member to take time for yourself away
from the situation when things feel overwhelming. Take turns with the other parent
so you each have peaceful times away from the situation. If possible, spend one on one
time with other children in the home. This will reduce their stress level as well."
"Because Aspergers syndrome sufferers have normal to high intelligence, they often
go into careers or jobs when they get older. In some cases, the field they enter is
related to one or more of those things the child was fixated on when a child. For
example, if an Aspergers syndrome child has a fixation on the weather, he or she can
think about a career in meteorology.
Other careers include working in the music industry. Aspergers syndrome individuals
often develop striking musical abilities and can then work in this field as a later
career. Careers involving mathematics or science are also common in Aspergers
syndrome. This can include becoming an accountant, working in economics, working in
scientific research, working as a university professor or other mathematical or
scientific area. Often, the interest in math and science are natural gifts for these
children and the transition from avocation to vocation is usually a seamless one."
go into careers or jobs when they get older. In some cases, the field they enter is
related to one or more of those things the child was fixated on when a child. For
example, if an Aspergers syndrome child has a fixation on the weather, he or she can
think about a career in meteorology.
Other careers include working in the music industry. Aspergers syndrome individuals
often develop striking musical abilities and can then work in this field as a later
career. Careers involving mathematics or science are also common in Aspergers
syndrome. This can include becoming an accountant, working in economics, working in
scientific research, working as a university professor or other mathematical or
scientific area. Often, the interest in math and science are natural gifts for these
children and the transition from avocation to vocation is usually a seamless one."
| * Additional excerpts from The Aspergers Comprehensive Handbook are available by request. Send your request to Mark Hutten, M.A. at mbhutten@yahoo.com |