Behavior Contracts
The Behavior Contract—
You thought the "terrible twos" were bad. Now there's dating, driving, drugs,
alcohol, chores, grades and a whole slew of other issues waiting to ambush you
as a parent. Besides begging and pleading, what can you do to keep your child
safe and happy?
A behavior contract is an agreement between the child and parent. The
behavior contract is a written agreement about how the individual will behave.
It will indicate the appropriate consequence should the child neglect to behave
according to the contract, and it also states the reinforcer to be used for
successful compliance. The behavior contract provides the child with structure
and self-management.
Behavior contracts provide many benefits to those that use them:
· They clearly define what is expected
· They provide structure and consistency
· They allow both parties to work together
· They promote positive and appropriate behavior
· They hold individuals accountable
Behavior contracts set ground rules for home-life with your child or teen.
Behavior contracts for children and teens provide the incentive they need to
change bad behavior patterns. Behavior contracts encourage good behavior
because incentives or rewards are given for accomplishing goals set forth in the
contract. Rewards do not have to be expensive, complicated or even tangible.
Behavior contracts can include such areas as driving, substance abuse, school,
allowance, chores, working, dating, and more. Behavior contracts may be
utilized for incidents such as violation of house rules, arguing about rules and
directives, failure to complete chores on time, failure to focus on homework, and
more. Behavior contracts help avoid the gray areas and make sure everyone in
the family understands the family’s values and rules.
Parents need to sit down and decide what the rules are going to be and what
discipline will be forced if those rules are broken. Parents need to be ready to
listen to their kids' concerns with the agreements and make any changes that
are appropriate. Parents need to write the contracts in clear, simple language
that can be easily understood by the child. Parents need to involve their
children in the process by writing the contract and then discussing it in detail
with their children and making changes if necessary. Parents and children
must sign and date the agreement.
Developing the Contract—
The contract should include the following:
· Define who and how the behavior will be monitored. (parent’s initials, stickers,
check mark system, etc.)
· How the child receive the reward (e.g., will be able to have a friend spend the
night over the weekend …will be able to order pizza on Friday night …etc.)
· Set a date for reviewing the contract
· The goal (e.g., will not use profanity …will not pick on younger brother …will
be home by 9:00 PM …etc.)
· What the consequence is should the child not adhere to the behavior described
in the contract (e.g., will be grounded for one evening without privileges)
Other considerations:
Some Successful Reinforcers/Rewards—
· Use of cool gadgets (e.g., ipods, cell phones, video games, etc.)
· Snacks or fast food
· Being able to stay up late on the weekend
· Being able to spend the night at a friend’s house
· Almost any activities or privileges
Behavior contracts are one of the simplest but most overlooked techniques
available to help parents through the difficult preteen and teenage years. When
used properly, written contracts can be incredibly successful in preventing or
stopping unwanted behavior.
Behavior contracts work because all children want and need structure in their
lives. Written agreements will bring a calming effect to them because they
know the rules and their consequences and find that very reassuring. In
addition, written contracts will reduce the number of disagreements between
parents and their kids because the rules were previously discussed and agreed
upon in advance.
You thought the "terrible twos" were bad. Now there's dating, driving, drugs,
alcohol, chores, grades and a whole slew of other issues waiting to ambush you
as a parent. Besides begging and pleading, what can you do to keep your child
safe and happy?
A behavior contract is an agreement between the child and parent. The
behavior contract is a written agreement about how the individual will behave.
It will indicate the appropriate consequence should the child neglect to behave
according to the contract, and it also states the reinforcer to be used for
successful compliance. The behavior contract provides the child with structure
and self-management.
Behavior contracts provide many benefits to those that use them:
· They clearly define what is expected
· They provide structure and consistency
· They allow both parties to work together
· They promote positive and appropriate behavior
· They hold individuals accountable
Behavior contracts set ground rules for home-life with your child or teen.
Behavior contracts for children and teens provide the incentive they need to
change bad behavior patterns. Behavior contracts encourage good behavior
because incentives or rewards are given for accomplishing goals set forth in the
contract. Rewards do not have to be expensive, complicated or even tangible.
Behavior contracts can include such areas as driving, substance abuse, school,
allowance, chores, working, dating, and more. Behavior contracts may be
utilized for incidents such as violation of house rules, arguing about rules and
directives, failure to complete chores on time, failure to focus on homework, and
more. Behavior contracts help avoid the gray areas and make sure everyone in
the family understands the family’s values and rules.
Parents need to sit down and decide what the rules are going to be and what
discipline will be forced if those rules are broken. Parents need to be ready to
listen to their kids' concerns with the agreements and make any changes that
are appropriate. Parents need to write the contracts in clear, simple language
that can be easily understood by the child. Parents need to involve their
children in the process by writing the contract and then discussing it in detail
with their children and making changes if necessary. Parents and children
must sign and date the agreement.
Developing the Contract—
The contract should include the following:
· Define who and how the behavior will be monitored. (parent’s initials, stickers,
check mark system, etc.)
· How the child receive the reward (e.g., will be able to have a friend spend the
night over the weekend …will be able to order pizza on Friday night …etc.)
· Set a date for reviewing the contract
· The goal (e.g., will not use profanity …will not pick on younger brother …will
be home by 9:00 PM …etc.)
· What the consequence is should the child not adhere to the behavior described
in the contract (e.g., will be grounded for one evening without privileges)
Other considerations:
- Ask the child to make suggestions for reinforcement and consequence for
failure to comply.
- Be patient and consistent, and you WILL see results.
- Consequences and reinforcers need to be thought out clearly -- you can
include tangible reinforcers, social or activity based reinforcers,
curtailment of an activity, tokens that can be cashed in for a specific
activity etc.
- Focus on the ‘child making better choices’ rather than ‘controlling a child's
behavior’.
- Involve the child in the writing of the contract.
- Let your child know – in no uncertain terms -- that you like them, you're
only disappointed in their behavior.
- Name specific behaviors to be changed and focus on only 1 or 2 behaviors
at a time.
- Review and revise the contract as needed, and include the child when
making revisions.
Some Successful Reinforcers/Rewards—
· Use of cool gadgets (e.g., ipods, cell phones, video games, etc.)
· Snacks or fast food
· Being able to stay up late on the weekend
· Being able to spend the night at a friend’s house
· Almost any activities or privileges
Behavior contracts are one of the simplest but most overlooked techniques
available to help parents through the difficult preteen and teenage years. When
used properly, written contracts can be incredibly successful in preventing or
stopping unwanted behavior.
Behavior contracts work because all children want and need structure in their
lives. Written agreements will bring a calming effect to them because they
know the rules and their consequences and find that very reassuring. In
addition, written contracts will reduce the number of disagreements between
parents and their kids because the rules were previously discussed and agreed
upon in advance.
| Below is an example of a behavior contract. CLICK HERE for a blank version of this contract that you can print out. |
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