Taking Care of Your Mental Health--

Here are some important concepts to bear in mind when taking
care of your mental health:

  • Mentally go beyond the problem and project yourself
    to a future time where the problem could not
    possibly matter anymore.

  • Develop a part of you that serves as an impartial and
    dispassionate observer of your out-of-control kid,
    regardless of circumstance.  

  • Visualize your out-of-control daughter as a mother
    going through her own parent-child conflict.
    Visualize your out-of-control son as a father having
    to deal with HIS verbally abusive son.

  • When you resist (e.g., struggle with, try to change)
    your difficult kid, it’s usually you that breaks.  As
    soon as you accept the situation for what it is, you
    can begin to access your resources and act
    constructively to influence his/her behavior.

  • BREATHE MORE, THINK LESS.

  • Somewhere in this difficult experience is an
    opportunity.

  • ASK FOR GUIDANCE >>> TRUST >>> DETACH FROM
    THE OUTCOME >>> DON’T TAKE ANYTHING
    PERSONALLY >>> NEVER GIVE UP.

  • What you learn from dealing with the difficult kid will
    make you stronger and help you in many other areas
    of your life.

  • YOU MAY NOT UNDERSTAND IT … MAY NOT AGREE
    WITH IT …AND MAY NOT LIKE IT, BUT YOU DON’T
    HAVE TO TORTURE YOURSELF WITH THOUGHTS
    ABOUT IT.

  • Experiment.  Try novel approaches.  Do the last thing
    you would ever think to do first!

  • LET NO ONE OR NO THING STEAL YOUR JOY.

  • Know that anything is possible.

  • YOUR KID IS A WORK IN PROGRESS.

  • THE OPPOSITE OF ANGER IS PATIENCE.

  • Let go and let God.                                               

  • All things must pass.

  • WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND.

  • Just think for a moment about how old you are, and
    about all you've been through.

  • All things work together for good.  It’s likely that
    something wonderful is emerging from your current
    difficult kid-situation -- and that you haven’t seen it
    yet.  EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A GOOD REASON.

  • YOUR MOST DIFFICULT PEOPLE ARE YOUR
    GREATEST TEACHERS.

  • YOUR MOST DIFFICULT SITUATIONS STRENGTHEN
    YOU.

  • THE LESS YOU TRY TO CONTROL OTHERS, THE MORE
    CONTROL YOU GET.

  • RATHER THAN FOCUSING ON WHAT YOU DON’T
    WANT AND WHAT IS GOING WRONG, FOCUS ON
    WHAT YOU DO WANT AND WHAT IS GOING RIGHT.

  • RATHER THAN FOCUSING ON HOW YOU ARE BEING
    MISTREATED, FOCUS ON HOW YOU CAN TAKE CARE
    OF YOURSELF.
Change Your Perspective--
Lack of sleep, headaches, nervousness, and anxiety are just a few of the
problems that can arise out of the everyday parenting-challenges that all
parents face.  Developed by health and wellness professionals, this Body
Relaxation exercise provides you with an easy self-help technique that has
been proven to be highly effective in battling stress and sleeplessness:
Instruction Video #6
Instructional Video #7



Dear Parents,



When we find ourselves in the position of being a parent
to a child experiencing severe emotional and behavioral
problems (e.g., ODD, Conduct Disorder, ADHD, Bipolar,
Aspergers), we will either seek strength and guidance
from a Higher Power - or we will burnout, get sick and
give up. To parent a strong-willed, out-of-control child
without assistance from a Power 'greater than ourselves'
is analogous to rowing up the river without any paddles.

I want to share an important spiritual principle with you:

What You Think About Expands

Let me help you wrap your brain around this concept.

If you believe, for example, that people cannot be trusted
and that they are generally self-serving -- you will find a
lot of untrustworthy, selfish individuals showing up in
your life.

If you believe that your family will never experience any joy
or peace -- you will find a lot of sadness and discontent
arriving at your doorstep, not to mention living day-to-day
in a near-constant state of depression and helplessness.

If you believe that your son or daughter is destined for a
lifetime of failure and misery -- you're right!

Conversely, if you believe that people tend to want to
live up to your trust and that they CAN be influenced to
change unwanted behavior -- then you will attract
numerous individuals who are trustworthy and capable
of change.

If you believe that your family and children are a "work in
progress" and that the best is yet to come -- then you will
have patience with the parenting process and will see a
constant, loving source of hope and reassurance for the
future.

This is not hype I'm referring to here. Rather, this is a
natural "law of the universe": What you think about
becomes your reality. We don't know why it works this
way, but we have much evidence that it DOES work this
way.

Resist your impulse to strive and struggle for what you
want; don't strain to achieve. Instead, enjoy the process
of the parenting-work you are doing. The results will
come independent of your striving for them. Prosperity is
about process, not outcome. Process is about purpose,
and purpose is about loving and giving.

When you feel you have not done enough, or that you
have done the wrong thing, or that you have not tried hard
enough, you feel guilty as a parent. If you continue to feel
this way, you can be causing damage to your immune
system. Chronic emotional pain is a habit. Why suffer?
Get rid of the expectation and belief that you must have it.
Break the habit! In the long or short run, that damage will
do you in. But positive feelings about yourself and the
work you are doing as a parent, leading you to be
optimistic rather than pessimistic, contribute to health.

Negative thinking (which weakens the immune system,
thus creating health problems) includes: guilt, worry,
anxiety, secret-frustrations, insecurity, fear, jealousy,
suspicion, hatred, antagonism, anger, despair,
mourning, self-doubt, and being out of step with people
and things around you.

Positive thinking (which contributes to health) includes:
love, faith, fun, appreciation, optimism, security, courage,
cooperation, compassion, joy, generosity, friendliness,
patience, helpfulness, ambition, and being in harmony
with people and things around you.

Speak it into existence. This is a foreign concept to
many. What do I mean by speaking it into existence?

Remember: What You Think About Expands. And your
words are simply expressions of your thoughts. Thus,
identify what it is that you want and need, and say it out
loud to yourself. Here are some examples:

"Today, I have peace in my mind and joy in my heart."

"I walk through my day knowing that I have the strength
and confidence to influence my children to make better
choices."

"I am in charge of my day -- and I see myself as a victor,
not a victim."

"I have a new sense of hope as well as patience."

Now I AM going to speak something into existence
FOR YOU:

You are learning that you tend to take life too seriously.

You are discovering that you tend to take things too
personally.

You are finding that you have been taking on too much
responsibility.

Right here, right now -- you are slowing down and
learning how to have a more relaxed attitude -- in all
things.

Sincerely,

Mark
Parents with strong-willed, out-of-control children simply
must take care of themselves in ways they wouldn't have
to if their children were not so intense and demanding.

One of the best ways we care for ourselves as parents is
find time to de-stress. And one of the best ways to
de-stress is through meditation.

Our philosophy is as follows:

You will either find time to relax and meditate,
or you will find time to stress-out and get sick!
Can't see the video? CLICK HERE
Can't see the video? CLICK HERE